Bad Habits At Work You Don’t Know You Have

by HEATHER MCCULLIGH | Jun 29th, 2010 | Performance Management | 0 Comments

By Mary Montserrat-Howlett

A habit is something you can do without thinking – which is why most of us have so many of them. ~Frank Howard Clark

Who would we be without our habits? Without those little idiosyncrasies and automatic routines that distinguish one person from the next? Our habits, good and bad, play a paramount role in defining who we are, and subsequently, how others judge our character. In a work setting, our habits can have a significant impact on how we function, how productive we are, on our performance appraisal and how our colleagues perceive us. So it’s no surprise that exercising good habits can influence the success of our careers.

Given that we’re all marked by our habits, this article will outline some of the major bad habits we may be exhibiting in the workplace that we may not be aware of, but that could be impeding our careers. Being aware of our behaviors in our work environment can help shift a bad habit cycle and transform it into a positive working routine.
Top 10 Bad Work Habits

  1. Isolating Yourself
  2. Avoiding Work
  3. Resisting Change
  4. Being Negative
  5. Gossiping
  6. Procrastinating, Then Rushing
  7. Being Disorganized
  8. Not Sharing Experience
  9. Sharing Too Many Experiences
  10. Always Taking Things Personally

The easier it is to do, the harder it is to change. ~Eng’s Principle

The first step to breaking a bad habit is to recognize it. In 5 Steps to Breaking Bad Habits and Being More Productive, Shelley Doll suggests keeping a journal to track how you spend your days at the office, including things like start and end times, locations, and participants. Performance review software is also fantastic at aligning employee performances with company objectives.  You may be surprised by what you discover about yourself in your work environment. Taking note of how you spend your day will also help you to identify your “triggers” and understand what sets off your bad habits and your good ones. You can then work on creating positive habits to replace the negative ones, for each of the triggers.

Bad Habit 1: Isolating Yourself


If you want to argue that the point of being at work is to work, you’re right. But if you find yourself rarely participating in conversations, it can have undesired consequences that affect you and those around you.
You’re not obligated to like everyone; not everyone has to like you either. However, having good manners and a friendly disposition can go a long way. Just think about how significantly your day can change when someone smiles at you. It’s the simple gestures such as smiling, making eye contact, saying hello when you walk in and good bye when you leave that yield unprecedented results in the long run. Participating in work activities, going to lunch, these also give you the opportunity to get to know co-workers in a different setting. These small efforts are at the forefront of maintaining harmonious relationships with your colleagues and enabling what is called group synergy, a group intelligence that emerges from the collaboration of many individuals.

Bad Habit 2: Avoiding Work

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If you find yourself continuously hesitating to take on new projects or are exceptionally skilled at finding someone who can do a task “better than you”, you may inadvertently be denying yourself the chance to learn something new. True, sometimes there is someone better to handle a job but don’t get confused; there is a big difference between delegating work and simply avoiding it. Where delegating is an aptitude for assigning specific tasks to the appropriate people, avoiding just means not doing the work at all. The more work you offload, the more pressure you put on others. While this doesn’t entail saying “Yes” to every task, showing your willingness to help and find solutions reflects positively on you and your work ethic. It may well encourage others to want to work with you, or recommend you for important projects in the future.

Bad Habit 3: Resisting Change


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Often times, people aren’t comfortable with change. The mere fact that “We’ve done it this way for 30 years” makes them resistant to new ideas. Coupled with this resistance is often a deep-seated fear of change. Overcoming this fear sometimes takes pretending: embracing something that makes you feel uneasy, anxious or scared. Change will happen with or without you, so it’s up to you to either take part in it or watch it from the outskirts. If you truly feel that a new method of doing something will be counterproductive to the company’s goals, express your concerns, but have a set of alternatives that you think could work as well, or better.

Bad Habit 4: Being Negative


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“Disappointment requires adequate planning” ~Richard Bandler

The “Negaholic”, as coined by Dr. Cherie Carter-Scott, is a person who is addicted to negativity in thought, word, or behavior. Negativity can be highly contagious and spread rapidly in an office setting. Being negative is a vicious cycle that’s easy to fall into. It can quickly become second nature and make you begin to think, feel, and believe that you are insufficient to meet the challenges that are being presented to you. You may also resort to putting the blame on factors outside yourself rather than examining within.

There’s nothing as energy-sapping as having to deal with a spiteful, pessimistic co-worker. One of the first habits to get into when trying to overcome the negative cycle is to focus on the bright side of things. Life isn’t always perfect. Things do go wrong, but even when they do, if you focus your energy towards what you’ve learned from a bad situation, you can manage it better in the future. Being able to accept a situation and move forward is fundamental to having a positive outlook.

Bad Habit 5: Gossiping


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Humans may be curious creatures, but there’s a fine line between being inquisitive and being a nosy gossip. See if you can find a trigger to the gossiping behavior. If you tend to gossip over lunch, maybe you have to rethink going to lunch with people who gossip. Conversations with co-workers always demand a certain level of discretion in order to protect people’s privacy and respect their boundaries. Asking too many personal questions and meddling in people’s private affairs can make them feel cornered and uncomfortable. If someone wants to involve you, you will be brought in the loop.

Bad Habit 6: Procrastinating, Then Rushing


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Some people say they work best under pressure but procrastination becomes a problem when it begins to impede your performance. Projects get delayed, you get stressed, and the quality of your work can suffer. Some habits that may contribute to your procrastination are personal phone calls, long breaks, surfing the Internet for non-work related purposes, or even playing online games. When the deadline finally arrives, the work may be complete but the results are only mediocre. The best way to break a habit is to drop it. Quitting procrastination takes a good schedule, a time management solution, and dedication.

Bad habits are easier to abandon today than tomorrow. ~Yiddish Proverb

Bad Habit 7: Being Disorganized (That includes your desktop!)


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If scattered documents, clutter, and a Great Wall of Coffee Cups have taken over your workstation, it’s time to reclaim your land. Trying to be productive in a chaotic workspace is about as effective as trying to walk with your feet tied. You find yourself struggling to move but never getting anywhere. You make things much easier on yourself when you don’t have to spend time searching for things, and aren’t distracted by all the stuff around you. It’s also nice to not feel overwhelmed and frustrated by your surroundings. Feng Shui experts claim that your workspace represents your state of mind. The cleaner and more organized your workspace, the more balanced and focused your mind can be.

Habit 8: Not Sharing Experience


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Do you have the habit of doing instead of teaching? Doing without explaining how you do it? Sharing your knowledge with others is an important part of talent management and a positive habit that renders everyone capable of sharing responsibilities and promoting group synergy. Take the time to show someone how something is done. Let them ask you questions until they understand. The more everyone knows about how to do each other’s job, the more effectively you work as a whole.

Habit 9: Sharing Too Many Experiences


If you find yourself sharing personal information even when you haven’t been asked, you’re probably sharing too much. The over-sharers are often very open about their personal problems, and thrive on drama. The risk in constantly volunteering stories about your personal life is that these stories (or you) can become the subject of ridicule at work. Try to leave your personal issues outside of work. When you’re at work, really BE at work. Learn to channel the stresses you experience in your personal life into productivity in your professional one.

Habit 10: Always Taking Things Personally


Aim for success not perfection ~Dr. David M. Burns

Sometimes we interpret harmless feedback as a personal attack. It’s not easy to swallow criticism, even if it isn’t meant to be critical of us. The intent is usually constructive and aims to help you excel in what you do. Keep telling yourself that the intent is not to demean or hurt your feelings but to help you grow, learn and improve.

Much of our life has been pre-programmed by our past behavior, but that doesn’t mean we’re unable to change our paths. It’s only once we’ve recognized our patterns and behaviors that we can work to replace our negative routines, with positive ones. As Aristotle says, “We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence, then, is not an act, but a habit.”

 

Source: http://www.halogensoftware.com/blog/bad-habits-at-work-you-dont-know-you-have/

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You Already Have All You Need

A few remarks made by one of my most creative coachees once that still ring in my ears: Everyone already has all they need, but they don’t realize it. They keep looking out there for fulfillment, but they don’t look at what they already have that they can make the most of.

This has made me apply this perspective on everybody around me and everyone I had dealt with. I realized that it was true. Most people thought they needed to learn more things, earn more money, lose some weight, etc. to be happy and fulfill their goals, but what they haven’t realized yet is that they already have the most important components that allow their brains and bodies to take them to where they wish to be. All they needed was acting upon those components!

Can you imagine what a great and positive shift in perspective you’d have if you just believed you already had what you needed?

Can gratitude and keeping a daily “I’m Grateful For” Journal help you achieve that?

Alternatively, does stopping to look outside for reassurance be the key?

In my opinion, the combination of all of these can be extremely powerful if we just believed in it!

Why abuse and bully yourself, your partner or your kids for things you think are necessary? Why not harness what you all have and act upon that positively (i.e. productively)? This means that we positively (not judgmentally) support one another to achieve what we’re inviting them to achieve.

Love of others happens truly after self-love exists. So trust yourself and love it for whatever it is, then you’ll start seeing the world from a positive perspective. At the end of the day, what’s the point of proving everyone else guilty or wrong? False sense of victory?

Cheer up, count your blessings, feel grateful for them and choose the right actions to make the most out of them.

Cheers!

The Four Seasons of Life, The Four Seasons of Love

The Four Seasons of Life, The Four Seasons of Love

Often times in conversations with friends or clients, I have used the analogy of the four seasons to assimilate the happenings of daily life and relationship challenges that happened in my as well as their lives. It is a positive thinking exercise and a very effective tool that can help one handle upsetting situations cleverly and realistically.

Life is not about what ‘we’ want it to be. Life is a free-flowing force that is so powerful, wise and miraculous. We can’t simply belittle it just because we may not get the wisdom behind it sometimes. Things happen for a reason, and things eventually fall into their places. So why push, pull, precipitate, complain, and so on. Repeating such unproductive/ negative attitudes only serve as a poison we inject into our blood.

The Four Seasons of Life, The Four Seasons of Love Exercise:

Image via Wikipedia

This is a visualization technique that I use to help me – and my clients - see incidents for what they are, make life more manageable and overcome challenges with positivity.

Here is how it goes.

In the past, whenever I had a gloomy day at work, or with my family, I’d look at it as a grey and cold winter day, with strong winds sometimes. Similarly, whenever my partner and I entered a gloomy phase of mutual discomfort, due to some misunderstanding, in which I felt I had not caused in any way, or if the subject of argument to me was no big a deal – instead of cursing the day and firing out my rage right at him – mentally, I’d declare it a grey winter day. On such weather, I’d go back to my comfort zone, treat myself to a hot and comforting drink, and stay in till the sun came out. Meanwhile, I’d contemplate what happened, why, and how we can solve the problem. If I realized that the problem had been caused by me in any way, I’d start thinking of a solution or a way to make up for what I did. If the result of my reasoning was that it was something my partner did or said that upset me, or if it was a simple misunderstanding – which as silly as it sounds can lead to major and upsetting arguments- I’d wait until it is the appropriate time to address and discuss it calmly, find a solution for it and then makeup.

At all times, I’d try to stay away from that gloomy weather as much as I could, since rain and cold make us sick. Similarly, going back to a heated situation – especially when one is not yet ready- can only make it worse. Arguments can have toxic effects on both parties, and may eventually cause us to become ill, whether emotionally or physically. So, by exercising such way of positive thinking, I have learned to make the most of life’s happenings, and instead of wasting a long time being upset and sad around a particular matter, I’d see it assertively as a winter phase, which will end sometime in the future, and the sun would come out again to shed on the world abundant positive feelings, like friendliness, empathy, gratitude, loyalty, happiness, etc.

Meanwhile, by visualizing that I was staying in, enjoying my treat, contemplating what had happened, I’d give myself and the other person (my sibling, partner, child, co-worker, etc.) a chance to calm down and reflect on what had happened. Instead of obsessing about it all day, I’d go about living my regular life in the most ordinary way. One bad thing, in my opinion, should not and does not deserve to spoil the other aspects of my life. Things fall into their places, when we handle them wisely. However, the least I can do in any heated situation is to mainly reflect on the part I had played in it. No one is perfect and certainly misunderstandings happen.

On the other hand, some challenges may be the product of a purposeful harmful act by others, and that too deserves contemplation, so we learn how to handle it. Yet, if we are going to allow ourselves to get dragged into an escalating negative emotional havoc, we then may not be capable of finding a solution for it. So at all times, stay away from negative energy and angry situations for a while, reflect then choose the right time (when the clouds clear out) to handle it.

The winter analogy can also be applied to one’s disrupting their diet. We are all guilty of that one time or another. We love our bodies, yet sticking to a regime may be challenging sometimes. Treating a messed-up dieting day like a tough winter day, on which it was difficult to commit, helps free us from the blocking feelings of guilt and self-loathing. You may have needed the comfort of a hot chocolate, a chocolate bar, a creamy soup, etc. This is certainly not a sin. It is OK. Life will go on, and you can go back to your regime, when the sun comes out, and you feel energetic, determined and active.

Certainly, this technique wasn’t there all my life. I have developed it through experience as a way of seeing problematic situations as “temporary” occurrences.

Living life as is, and not as ‘it is supposed to be’, may make it easier for us to accept its challenges, and rather rise above them with resilience. Unrealistic expectations, dreams, myths, gossip, etc. may never solve a problem, and most importantly, they may never become real. What we are left with then is illusion, and this is very lonely and cold place to be in.

What about the other seasons? They all work. This is how.

In fall, it is chilly yet it doesn’t take our eyes much time to see the beauty behind that cool weather. Similarly, some misunderstandings between two friends, sisters, brothers, etc. can occur but it may not take them a while to realize that the beauty of their friendship is worth coming forth and resolving the problem at hand.

How about spring and summer?

Well, in spring, things start to green and brighten up. The skies clear up, and the trees start to blossom. Similarly, this is usually the phase where a friendship or a relationship start showing off its beauty, and reflecting that in enjoyable feelings, whose sweetness we savor at all times. Usually, this period of bliss leaves the best memories especially that they mark their contrast upon happening after a period of coldness, absence from your loved ones (at work, on a business trip, normal everyday business, etc.) or fights. When winter resolves, spring shines its happiness in our hearts, and warms the body with blood that is pumped in it with strong palpitations.

Summer is usually a hard-core fun time (a trip somewhere nice, a good phase of achievement at work, some cool gatherings, etc.) This is where we regain our balance and renew our energy, or refill some trying to save for upcoming winter times. These happy deposits forge their memories into our hearts, souls and brains, and they are the ones that help us give the other person benefit of the doubt, when negative/unhappy occurrences happen.

There’s so much beauty in the world for the eyes to behold. It’s just a matter of observing it or not.

No one is perfect, not us nor them. So why assume that in the first place? This is only bound to hurt us more than them.

Hope this technique helps you like it has helped me. Allow your soul to embrace the beauty of other souls and things around you.

~~Peace upon you all~~

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