What Is Happiness To You? (in a poem)

I was trying to find a poem that offered a nice description of Happiness, and I came across this one published by Juan Olivarez on poemhunter.com

Happiness

Happiness is being home again,
Happiness is walking in the rain.
Happiness is waking with no pain.

Happiness to see my humble home,
Happiness at not being alone,
Happiness to sit, and not to roam.

Happiness is family to me,
Happiness in the faces, I longed to see,
Happiness is once more being free.

6/12/10 29 palms ca.

Juan Olivarez
Submitted: Saturday, June 12, 2010
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The Surprising Science of Motivation by Daniel Pink

Best Coaching Blog 2012

Hello everyone,
The School of Coaching Mastery is holding a competition of the Best Coaching Blog for the year 2012. I have been blessed so far with an increasing number of followers who really inspire me and motivate me to continue doing what I do best, Coaching and writing articles around my experiences in this field.

The reason why I participated in the competition is because I am hoping to attract even more traffic to my website and blog, and enrich my contacts’ list.

All of your comments, follows and Likes have made me feel that I’ve been in the company of all of you. What a great and motivating feeling it has been!

Therefore, I would really appreciate it if you’d take a minute to vote for me clicking the following button (which you can also find to the right side of the screen on my website http://www.wisdomwithinconsultancy.com and my blog wisdomwithinus.wordpress.com

Thank you! :-)

Texting That Saves Lives

Bad Habits At Work You Don’t Know You Have

by HEATHER MCCULLIGH | Jun 29th, 2010 | Performance Management | 0 Comments

By Mary Montserrat-Howlett

A habit is something you can do without thinking – which is why most of us have so many of them. ~Frank Howard Clark

Who would we be without our habits? Without those little idiosyncrasies and automatic routines that distinguish one person from the next? Our habits, good and bad, play a paramount role in defining who we are, and subsequently, how others judge our character. In a work setting, our habits can have a significant impact on how we function, how productive we are, on our performance appraisal and how our colleagues perceive us. So it’s no surprise that exercising good habits can influence the success of our careers.

Given that we’re all marked by our habits, this article will outline some of the major bad habits we may be exhibiting in the workplace that we may not be aware of, but that could be impeding our careers. Being aware of our behaviors in our work environment can help shift a bad habit cycle and transform it into a positive working routine.
Top 10 Bad Work Habits

  1. Isolating Yourself
  2. Avoiding Work
  3. Resisting Change
  4. Being Negative
  5. Gossiping
  6. Procrastinating, Then Rushing
  7. Being Disorganized
  8. Not Sharing Experience
  9. Sharing Too Many Experiences
  10. Always Taking Things Personally

The easier it is to do, the harder it is to change. ~Eng’s Principle

The first step to breaking a bad habit is to recognize it. In 5 Steps to Breaking Bad Habits and Being More Productive, Shelley Doll suggests keeping a journal to track how you spend your days at the office, including things like start and end times, locations, and participants. Performance review software is also fantastic at aligning employee performances with company objectives.  You may be surprised by what you discover about yourself in your work environment. Taking note of how you spend your day will also help you to identify your “triggers” and understand what sets off your bad habits and your good ones. You can then work on creating positive habits to replace the negative ones, for each of the triggers.

Bad Habit 1: Isolating Yourself


If you want to argue that the point of being at work is to work, you’re right. But if you find yourself rarely participating in conversations, it can have undesired consequences that affect you and those around you.
You’re not obligated to like everyone; not everyone has to like you either. However, having good manners and a friendly disposition can go a long way. Just think about how significantly your day can change when someone smiles at you. It’s the simple gestures such as smiling, making eye contact, saying hello when you walk in and good bye when you leave that yield unprecedented results in the long run. Participating in work activities, going to lunch, these also give you the opportunity to get to know co-workers in a different setting. These small efforts are at the forefront of maintaining harmonious relationships with your colleagues and enabling what is called group synergy, a group intelligence that emerges from the collaboration of many individuals.

Bad Habit 2: Avoiding Work

woman-avoiding-work-290x218
(image: source)

If you find yourself continuously hesitating to take on new projects or are exceptionally skilled at finding someone who can do a task “better than you”, you may inadvertently be denying yourself the chance to learn something new. True, sometimes there is someone better to handle a job but don’t get confused; there is a big difference between delegating work and simply avoiding it. Where delegating is an aptitude for assigning specific tasks to the appropriate people, avoiding just means not doing the work at all. The more work you offload, the more pressure you put on others. While this doesn’t entail saying “Yes” to every task, showing your willingness to help and find solutions reflects positively on you and your work ethic. It may well encourage others to want to work with you, or recommend you for important projects in the future.

Bad Habit 3: Resisting Change


(image:source)
Often times, people aren’t comfortable with change. The mere fact that “We’ve done it this way for 30 years” makes them resistant to new ideas. Coupled with this resistance is often a deep-seated fear of change. Overcoming this fear sometimes takes pretending: embracing something that makes you feel uneasy, anxious or scared. Change will happen with or without you, so it’s up to you to either take part in it or watch it from the outskirts. If you truly feel that a new method of doing something will be counterproductive to the company’s goals, express your concerns, but have a set of alternatives that you think could work as well, or better.

Bad Habit 4: Being Negative


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“Disappointment requires adequate planning” ~Richard Bandler

The “Negaholic”, as coined by Dr. Cherie Carter-Scott, is a person who is addicted to negativity in thought, word, or behavior. Negativity can be highly contagious and spread rapidly in an office setting. Being negative is a vicious cycle that’s easy to fall into. It can quickly become second nature and make you begin to think, feel, and believe that you are insufficient to meet the challenges that are being presented to you. You may also resort to putting the blame on factors outside yourself rather than examining within.

There’s nothing as energy-sapping as having to deal with a spiteful, pessimistic co-worker. One of the first habits to get into when trying to overcome the negative cycle is to focus on the bright side of things. Life isn’t always perfect. Things do go wrong, but even when they do, if you focus your energy towards what you’ve learned from a bad situation, you can manage it better in the future. Being able to accept a situation and move forward is fundamental to having a positive outlook.

Bad Habit 5: Gossiping


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Humans may be curious creatures, but there’s a fine line between being inquisitive and being a nosy gossip. See if you can find a trigger to the gossiping behavior. If you tend to gossip over lunch, maybe you have to rethink going to lunch with people who gossip. Conversations with co-workers always demand a certain level of discretion in order to protect people’s privacy and respect their boundaries. Asking too many personal questions and meddling in people’s private affairs can make them feel cornered and uncomfortable. If someone wants to involve you, you will be brought in the loop.

Bad Habit 6: Procrastinating, Then Rushing


(image: source)
Some people say they work best under pressure but procrastination becomes a problem when it begins to impede your performance. Projects get delayed, you get stressed, and the quality of your work can suffer. Some habits that may contribute to your procrastination are personal phone calls, long breaks, surfing the Internet for non-work related purposes, or even playing online games. When the deadline finally arrives, the work may be complete but the results are only mediocre. The best way to break a habit is to drop it. Quitting procrastination takes a good schedule, a time management solution, and dedication.

Bad habits are easier to abandon today than tomorrow. ~Yiddish Proverb

Bad Habit 7: Being Disorganized (That includes your desktop!)


(image: source)
If scattered documents, clutter, and a Great Wall of Coffee Cups have taken over your workstation, it’s time to reclaim your land. Trying to be productive in a chaotic workspace is about as effective as trying to walk with your feet tied. You find yourself struggling to move but never getting anywhere. You make things much easier on yourself when you don’t have to spend time searching for things, and aren’t distracted by all the stuff around you. It’s also nice to not feel overwhelmed and frustrated by your surroundings. Feng Shui experts claim that your workspace represents your state of mind. The cleaner and more organized your workspace, the more balanced and focused your mind can be.

Habit 8: Not Sharing Experience


(image: source)
Do you have the habit of doing instead of teaching? Doing without explaining how you do it? Sharing your knowledge with others is an important part of talent management and a positive habit that renders everyone capable of sharing responsibilities and promoting group synergy. Take the time to show someone how something is done. Let them ask you questions until they understand. The more everyone knows about how to do each other’s job, the more effectively you work as a whole.

Habit 9: Sharing Too Many Experiences


If you find yourself sharing personal information even when you haven’t been asked, you’re probably sharing too much. The over-sharers are often very open about their personal problems, and thrive on drama. The risk in constantly volunteering stories about your personal life is that these stories (or you) can become the subject of ridicule at work. Try to leave your personal issues outside of work. When you’re at work, really BE at work. Learn to channel the stresses you experience in your personal life into productivity in your professional one.

Habit 10: Always Taking Things Personally


Aim for success not perfection ~Dr. David M. Burns

Sometimes we interpret harmless feedback as a personal attack. It’s not easy to swallow criticism, even if it isn’t meant to be critical of us. The intent is usually constructive and aims to help you excel in what you do. Keep telling yourself that the intent is not to demean or hurt your feelings but to help you grow, learn and improve.

Much of our life has been pre-programmed by our past behavior, but that doesn’t mean we’re unable to change our paths. It’s only once we’ve recognized our patterns and behaviors that we can work to replace our negative routines, with positive ones. As Aristotle says, “We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence, then, is not an act, but a habit.”

 

Source: http://www.halogensoftware.com/blog/bad-habits-at-work-you-dont-know-you-have/

Are We Wired for Empathy?

Source: http://www.6seconds.org/2012/01/16/mirror-neurons/

Published on Jan 16, 2012

What do mirror neurons teach about us about our empathy? This week, leading neuroscientist Marco Iacoboni visited with Six Seconds’ Master Class in Pajaro Dunes, California, for an oceanside chat on mirror neurons and their relationship to empathy and learning.  A few of us collected some of the takeaways:

What are Mirror Neurons?

Mirror neurons are “smart cells” in our brains that allow us to understand others’ actions, intentions, and feelings. The mirror neurons are in many areas of our brains, and they fire when we perform an action such as grasping an apple, and similarly we see others doing it.  As it turns out, our mirror neurons fire when we experience an emotion and similarly when we see others experiencing an emotion, such as happiness, fear, anger, or sadness. When we see someone being sad, for example, our mirror neurons fire and that allows us to experience the same sadness and to feel empathy.  We don’t need to “think” about the other person being sad, we actually experience it firsthand.  The reaction of mirror neurons allows us to socialize and communicate with others as we read their facial expressions. There is also an important ability to dampen this reaction, and there are several centers in our brains that act as “brakes” to keep us from becoming too caught up in others’ experiences. This process can have profound implications for our relationships.

Interestingly, human mirror neuron networks are stimulated in response to actions which are apparently meaningless, indicating a tendency to spontaneously model any and all movements by others (Giacomo Rizzolatti, Fogassi, & Gallese, 2001).

The Chameleon Effect

Professor Iacoboni explained that mirror neurons are the reason for the “chameleon effect” which is the brain-to-brain imitation of postures, mannerisms, and facial expressions.  It’s what causes adults to smile when they see a baby smiling.  He also said that people who are more empathetic exhibit the chameleon effect to a greater extent that other people do.  This is an automatic “matching” that causes humans to connect – even if they’re not aware of the connection.

Broken Mirror Neurons

Professor Iacoboni mentioned that children on the Autism Spectrum may struggle with social interaction because their mirror neuron systems are not functioning properly.  The discovery of mirror neuron deficiencies in people with autism opens up new approaches to diagnosing and treating the disorder.

Modeling

Inspired by Professor Iacoboni’s keynote presentation, we discussed the link between role modeling and the neuroscience of mirror neurons.  Modeling occurs because we can consciously and unconsciously observe someone and learn from them.  We can intentionally improve our abilities by paying attention to someone who is skilled in a particular area.  Iacoboni said that one of the first elements of learning is observing others, and we automatically begin to learn through this process.  We can intensify the learning by focusing on the role model and imagining ourselves doing what they do.  This is why we are committed to modeling excellence in emotional intelligence!  So if we are not achieving our desired results, we should “hang out” with people who are strong in these skills.

This seems to be true for emotions as well.  Through mirror neurons, emotions are contagious — so if we want to be more joyful (for example), a powerful action is to spend time with people who are full of joy.

Leadership

The power of mirror neurons is another compelling reason that leaders need to take responsibility for their own actions and choices.  People are literally mirroring the leader’s actions — and the leader’s emotions. Simply showing up with more ideal behavior and an intentional emotional state is an important part of imparting these qualities to others.   Since mirror neurons are “always on” leaders have a huge responsibility to monitor and manage themselves as role models.

Empathy

Iacoboni repeatedly reminded us that we are, literally, wired to connect.  Humans are social, and empathy is a fundamental component of the human condition.  In the new Afterword to his fascinating book, Mirroring People, Professor Iacoboni points to the importance of this groundbreaking research.  Mirror neurons “help us to be empathic and fundamentally attuned to other people.  This is perhaps the most important finding of all, and it is a beautiful one.”

To hear more about these concepts, listen to this dialogue between Professor Iacoboni and the Dalai Lama during “Happiness and its Causes” conference.

Can you feel the difference in your energy upon thinking positively?

Make it a habit of waking up to a whole new list of positive affirmations that can seriously brighten your way.

I have read in one of the interesting blogs I visited today a quote by Henry Ford that said:

“Whether you think you can, or think you can’t, you’re right”.

You are what and who you think you are.

Create a happier, warmer and more successful You each day!

The Science of Motivation

The Science of Motivation.

Are You An Adrenaline Addict?

Wednesday, July 6, 2011

Are you an Adrenaline Addict?

I heard the term “adrenaline addict” used the other day in a workshop I attended and have been thinking about it ever since. So I did some research and found some great information about adrenaline and how it can impact our quality of life and am excited to share it with you. In lay person terms, basically adrenaline is a hormone produced by the two adrenal glands located on top of our kidneys. These glands secrete adrenaline directly into the blood stream. Adrenaline is then carried by the blood to all the different parts of the body. It increases your heart rate, raises your blood pressure, and is associated with carrying blood away from certain areas of your brain and internal organs and into your muscles. As a result, adrenaline can increase speed and strength and decrease feeling pain. A large amount of adrenaline released into your system all at once causes what is often called an adrenaline dump, rush, or surge. All of these effects are designed to prepare your body to either run away or to fight. The rush can make you feel energized or it can make you feel shaky or weak – depending on the situation causing the adrenaline to be released. What’s interesting to me is that the same three ways people react to an adrenaline rush resulting in a perceived danger situation are the same three ways people react to an adrenaline rush resulting in the need to act quickly concerning making an important decision or embarking on a complex project. Canadian self defense expert, Tony Blauer says the natural adrenline response by people reacting to a phyiscal attack are: 1. Denial: “This can’t be happening” 2. Reality: “This is happening” 3. Resolve: “This is not going to happening” In the normal course of a day, we may find ourselves in situations that bring forth the adrenaline rush unexpectedly. For example, in a work setting, you may be asked to meet an unreasonable deadline, achieve a difficult target on a project, or have a tough but necessary conversation with someone. You may be asked to make a decision that could impact your life significantly and/or compromise those closest to you. In these everyday situations, adrenaline will kick in and I believe that our natural adreline response to a physical attack is the same for these situations. Denial – Reality – Resolve. Patrick Lencioni, president of the Table Group, says in his essay “The Painful Reality of Adrenaline Addiction”: “Executives with adrenaline addiction are the ones always pecking away at their Blackberries during meetings, talking on their cell phones during every five-minute break from those meetings, and checking e-mail late at night. They go from meeting to meeting to meeting with no time in between for reflection or thought. Always overwhelmed, adrenaline junkies seem to have a constant need for urgency, even panic, to get them through the day. They cannot grasp the race driver’s motto: you have to slow down to go fast. Instead, they keep their foot on the pedal at full throttle, convinced that any deceleration is lost opportunity.” Sound familiar? Overtime we become addicted to adrenaline – perhaps even rely on it to get us through the day. We keep going and going and going – like the energizer bunny until we come to a complete halt. That halt may result in feeling overwhelmed, tired, agitated, frustrated and in some instances manifesting further in phyiscal and mental health issues. That halt can and does have a significant and potential deterimental impact on our personal and professional lives. So what can we do? First, you can take the adrenaline addict assessment @ http://www.synergyunlimited.net/adrenaline-addict.htm. Here are some articles that you might find interesting and helpful: http://www.leadershipreview.org/2005winter/LencioniArticle.pdf

http://www.associatedcontent.com/article/32282/the_abcs_of_the_adrenal_glands.html?cat=5 http://www.allbusiness.com/human-resources/employee-development-time-management/3903596-1.html

Let me know what you learn and how I can support you!!!! Looking forward to hearing from you.

Posted by Kathy Munoz at 2:30 PM 0 comments

Source: http://impelinc.blogspot.com/

What Tolerations Are You Putting Up With In Your Life?